All trademarks and copyrights on this site are owned by their respective owners. The rest © 1993-2004 by Ugo Scarlata, all rights reserved.

All clauses of this disclaimer apply to the disclaimer itself, except for this first sentence. All other disclaimers that may be found on this site, or sites linked to herein, are obviously subsets of this disclaimer, invalid, illegal, or fattening. All metainformation, HTML tags, photographs, artwork, text, opinions, ideas, facts or factoids contained in this site are either my own, and therefore are Copyright © 1993-2004 by Ugo Scarlata, or duly licensed from and/or attributed to the writers, owners or copyright holders, or in good faith presumed to be in the public domain; however, you're free to copy, reproduce, expand, excerpt or adapt this disclaimer to your own purposes, at your own risk, as long as you assume all responsibility for doing so. All products, brands and company names mentioned are trademarks or trade names of the respective companies and you should mentally insert the appropriate TM, ®, © or whatever wherever appropriate. Any links to external sites and any comments about the contents thereof should not be construed as either endorsement or disapproval of such contents, even if such comments overtly purport to do so. E-mail me if you have detected a demonstrable copyright violation. 90% of all cited statistics may have been made up on the spot. Before entering this site be sure to make at least two back-up copies of your mind and other important data on other media to protect against data loss. Brains sold separately. Caveat Browsor. Use, duplication, disclosure or ritual exorcism of this information by the Government (any Government) is subject to the restrictions of physical laws. There is no conscious attempt made nor desire extant to libel or otherwise cause malicious damage, loss, public contempt, defamation, slander, blasphemy, treason, sedition, or ridicule to persons of any gender or even none, cabals, corporations, governments, institutions, or assemblies of inanimate objects, alien lifeforms, microorganisms, clergy, vegetables, animals, or any collections thereof. No representation whatsoever is made as to the accuracy, political correctness, spelling, syntax, semantics, content or meaning of the graphics, text or downloadable files on this site, or of suitability for use or quoting elsewhere or for any other particular purpose. As far as I'm concerned all information herein consists solely of sequences of zeroes and ones, being presented as either a satire or a parody of other sequences of zeroes and ones (or even of ones and zeroes) and neither I nor my service provider can be held responsible for any further interpretation, guesstimate, translation, exegesis, deconstruction, memetic emission or absorption, catalysis, transmogrification, alteration or forgery of such sequences made by either your hardware, software or wetware, or by any intervening data communications channel, even if previously advised of such a possibility. Any actions you take based on whatever you saw, or think you saw, on this site are entirely your own responsibility, so there! This site is directed at reasonably mature people of any age and if you're not among them, life will be tough. Off-site links will usually open in a new window to emphasize that I'm even less responsible for their content. Since all of the Internet's web pages are interlinked you will sooner than later come to what you may consider a silly, stupid, obscene or otherwise offensive site. Don't say I didn't warn you! No electrons, protons, neutrons or other sub-atomic particles, or agglomerations thereof, have been knowingly harmed in preparing this site. All quantum fields and/or state vectors related to this site may spontaneously collapse, decohere, and/or go all higgedly-piggedly as soon as you look at them, and I can't do anything about it. You may have some rights not detailed in this disclaimer but don't bet on it. Apply only to affected area. All models over 18 years of age or the local equivalent. Avoid contact with mucous membranes. Contents may settle during shipment. This disclaimer does not cover hurricane, lightning, tornado, tsunami, volcanic eruption, earthquake, flood, and other Acts of God, Gods and/or Godesses, misuse, neglect, leaking batteries, unauthorized repair, damage from improper installation, broken antenna or marred cabinet, incorrect line voltage, missing or altered serial numbers, sonic boom vibrations, electromagnetic radiation from nuclear blasts, customer adjustment, genetic drift and random neuronal firing. Many browsers look alike. Others don't. Use only in a well-ventilated area. Do not bend, fold, spindle, or mutilate. Do not use while operating a motor vehicle, heavy equipment, airplane, hang glider, or any powered device inserted into bodily orifices. If a rash, redness, irritation, or swelling develops, discontinue use. If condition persists, consult your physician. No user-serviceable parts inside. Objects in browser may be closer than they appear. One size fits all. Quantities are limited while supplies last. This site (except for a few exceptions which are clearly marked) contains no frames or ActiveX, transmits or receives no "cookies", and requires no particular plug-ins or software to view at your side, as long as you have a reasonably recent graphic browser which supports tables. You should know where to download one from, anyway. Disclaimer subject to change without notice. Your mileage may vary. This supersedes all previous notices. Reading a disclaimer like this all the way to the end may have caused irreversible but not necessarily malign changes to your neural whatchamacallits.

Last update: Jan. 31st, 2004.